When I don’t want to write a blog or weed or practice piano, I can usually think of a reason to avoid the activity. If I gave in repeatedly, you wouldn’t be reading this blog, the weeds would dominate, and the parishioners would hear sour notes. One idea that surprised me recently is that we can settle for service to avoid the call to love. I suppose that’s true. I can do a good deed for someone while harboring critical thoughts about them. When I’m taking an extra turn, I can mutter “Isn’t there anybody else?” When clearing someone else’s mess, my body tenses with angry reluctance. (“Why me?”)

When God, my angel, or a saint “messages me” I realize my service is a cover-up for my lack of love. I’m spending more thought and energy on not loving, even when appearances suggest I am charitable. When service is a way to dig deeper into my soul, I guess I need to sublimate my reasons to serve. I can, for example, write about this topic in today’s blog, I can weed prideful thinking, and I can practice putting on the mind of Christ. And I can still get the service accomplished!